It's the joy of a new born baby's giggle. It's the excitement of spring after a long winter. It's the promise of delicious vegetables in a garden just budding with green or the hope of fresh fruit from a tree only inches tall. It's when the combination of letter shapes and sounds suddenly click and they begin reading for the first time. It's when real music comes from tiny fingers on the keyboard and tiny eyes glow with the new found ability to make music. Stay green. Keep growing. Never lose the thrill of learning or helping others grow.
Green makes me giddy. I absolutely love seeing little green things growing. New life is precious. In the garden, in the womb, or in little eyes lighting up with a newly learned skill. The gardener, mother and teacher in me love new growth.
It's the joy of a new born baby's giggle. It's the excitement of spring after a long winter. It's the promise of delicious vegetables in a garden just budding with green or the hope of fresh fruit from a tree only inches tall. It's when the combination of letter shapes and sounds suddenly click and they begin reading for the first time. It's when real music comes from tiny fingers on the keyboard and tiny eyes glow with the new found ability to make music. Stay green. Keep growing. Never lose the thrill of learning or helping others grow.
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I was in a show choir in high school. For anyone who doesn't know what that is, it's a choir that sings and dances at the same time. We were an award winning group. One thing our teacher drilled into us was to always know 'where are you going next?' What's the next step? Where are we moving to?
Every position needed to flow into the next one. There was no time to stutter step into position or wait to see what someone else was doing. Maybe this is part of what makes me such a planner in life. I find it helps so much to take time to visualize where I'm going next. What the day holds. Thinking ahead so I can move flawlessly from one point to the next. I need to be asleep by ten so I can get up at five so I can exercise before a shower. During exercise thinking through the next step, devotions so I can be right spiritually when the kids get up. Breakfast ready so we aren't whining about hunger or sending people out last minute with junk food in their hands. Baking so we have bread for lunch, beans soaking so we can have a frugal dinner. Reading with the baby so his love tank is full when I sit down to teach the older ones. It goes further in time, week leading week and month before month. How will this year flow into next? The thoughts keep rolling. Maybe I am driven. Maybe I just want to be award winning in my life and there's no time to waist. When all six are around sometimes it's easy to get impatient with the little ones. Why can't they grow up quickly so we can play big kid games without the tiny pieces flying or papers being wrinkled or things lost. Or we could play sports as a family or go on longer hikes if the little ones could keep up. But when the big kids are gone I remember how precious the first few years are. I like reading picture books. I like snuggling and rocking. I like holding hands and pushing swings and braiding hair. Play dough, crayons, paint, bubble baths-messy maybe, but fun and relaxing. Toddlers think I'm funny and like to dance with me. They trust me. Little ones don't talk back and roll eyes either...unless they are copying a big kid. :) Yes, baby days are sweet. Let's not rush.
I always start my morning in the Word and journal. After breakfast with the family and getting the two oldest off to school, I realized it was time to revisit some books that have been collecting dust on the shelf for awhile. We had been using the NIV for our family devotions at the beginning of our homeschool day. With the older ones gone, I remembered it had been a long time since we had read through a children's Bible. The younger kids are really enjoying it. They know most of the stories, but a few are new. They beg me to keep reading every morning. After lunch we have another read aloud time. Again the realization that the younger ones wouldn't remember going through the little house books, caused me to reach for those coverless treasures. Always a good read. Grandpa's sled and the pig had us all laughing out loud. In the evening when the older kids are here, before bed we are reading The Hiding Place. I love good books.
Sometimes life takes unexpected twists and turns. Am I flexible enough to bend and flow? Or will I be rigid and brittle and break? We may think we know what's best, but God has a way of reminding us his ways are not our ways and his thoughts not our thoughts. I had thought I would homeschool my children all the way through to graduation. I thought there would come a time when my older children would begin to teach their younger siblings and take initiative to head up their own learning. I thought I would become good friends with my children once much of the training had taken place and they would see service within our home as joy. These things did come in a measure, but my children are not puppets. They have desires of their own, and they have voices. My oldest let hers ring clear that she really wanted to go to public school. I did everything I could to talk her out of it but she was adamant. I told her to pray about it, and I continued to do the same. God began to ask me questions. What would it look like if they never tested their wings until after graduation? Do you really want six kids living with you forever? Do you want them to be blindly obedient or do you want them to be able to make wise decisions? When can they start making their big decisions? Are you training them in the way THEY should go or in the way YOU would go? Do you trust me enough to take care of your children when you are not around, or are they only safe where you can see them? What if I want to introduce them to people and experiences outside your home that will profoundly impact them and therefore bless those around them? What if keeping them at home begins to crunch who I've made them to be and they begin rebelling to be heard and it negatively affects your family dynamics? What about the younger ones? Are you able to give them what they need when you are striving so hard to keep the older ones growing? Would the world fall apart if you let them make this decision and are there to help them through it? So, we set up entrance to public school-in November no less! Couldn't we have waited till a new school year? Trust. After the ball was rolling our second child decided he wanted to go as well. This was a bit if a surprise as he tends to be more introverted. Somehow the decision to let him go was a little easier. Now there would be two. They could at least know their sibling was down the hall and catch the bus together. I taught them in the same level at home so now I could just forget 5th grade and focus on the younger ones. Sure. Then our oldest decided she wanted to stay home. She changed her mind every day for several days and time was running out. We had a start date and things at home were rocky.
I finally said, "the decision has been made. You will start Wednesday." " What?! You're making me go to school? I thought it was my choice! This is junk. I don't want to go!!"She became very angry and declared she wasn't going. I knew part of this was a control battle and preadolescent hormones. That didn't make the next few days any easier. I also firmly believed now that she would enjoy public more and that inside that was her real choice. I also felt that this was the route we were to be taking as a family. So yes, I forced her to go to school! The first morning she was up at 5:30 waking up her brother and preparing to go. She was ready two hours early. She came home from school talking a mile a minute and was ready early the rest of the week. She hasn't said it but I think so far she's glad I 'forced' her. Her brother also has said its awesome and is ready to go each day. At home, I am amazed at the release I feel. I enjoy the younger grades. I enjoy feeling like I can relax and take more one on one time on the couch with each child. There just never seemed like enough time with six. Now, I know some families are able to work well with six or more at home, but I'll admit it. I was stressed! I have also been dealing with a seemingly never ending poison ivy battle since a recent move in April, the side effects of medicines for that and other circumstances that are part of all our worlds. God knows what we can and cannot handle and always finds a way. I'm sure there will be stressful days still. I'm sure there will be days getting kids to school will be a fight. I'm sure sometimes they will come home tired and fussy. I'm sure there will be issues we need to face that we may not have had if we all stayed home. I'm sure there will be family trips we have to skip or reschedule due to a public school schedule. But, we will keep pressing on and trusting that in all things God is working for our good! Ps-Someone may ask-Where was your husband in these decisions? He was right here and we made decisions together. He has always said as far as school goes, he didn't feel like he could homeschool our children but if I wanted to, he was fine with that. He would make it possible for me to do so. He also said, if there ever came a day I felt I couldn't or that they would be better off elsewhere, he understood and would support me in that. He has prayed with me and heard me cry. He has listened to all sides and stood by as a strong covering. Leading confidently by handing the education of our children primarily to me and not trying to control like I would have if the roles were reversed. Can we have a ball this evening?
Sure! What she didn't know is that daddy had just sent a text saying 'think of something fun to do as a family tonight. So we did. We dressed up. We set the table fancy and served a fun dinner. Then we turned the living room into a ballroom and danced. I enjoy doing these kinds of things. Found out we could get a pick up truck load full of drops from under the trees at the local orchard for $25, so off we went. We braved the poison ivy and picked up many buckets full. Showered as soon as we got home and are praying tomorrow shows no ill effects as a result of our bravery. :) This truly was a case of 'many hands make light work'. Before long we decided our truck was full enough to keep us busy for several days and walked back to the van. Little fellow enjoyed playing in the truck while we picked. We figured that was safer than letting him pick up 'balls' from the middle of the poison!
The first six weeks of school have passed. How have those weeks looked for us?
It felt good to get into a bit more of a structured routine after summer fun and exploring. Our mornings are a tad earlier. Monday through Friday (I get up early for my alone time and time with the Father and planning, daddy's schedule changes a bit so we see him when we do) kids get up, do upstairs chores, eat breakfast, clear the table and have my favorite time... Family devotions. We worship with the piano. Read a portion of scripture - often the proverb of the day, so far this year. We talk about what stood out to us, spend silent time praying and listening (with journals or drawing notebooks) and share what God puts on our hearts. We work on our memory verse. I love hearing what God speaks through my children. Even if at times these devotionals get a little crazy with toddler and 4 year old playing under the table or an attitude of an older child who woke up on the wrong side of the bed, these times together set the tone for our day and are beautiful. We put away our bibles and notebooks and set the timer for 15-20 minutes to get our downstairs chores done. Each of us has an area of responsibility in keeping the house up. Depending on how organized in am for the week, I will hand out individual work and circulate through helping each child on their level of math /reading /writing. Sometimes older children will help younger children. Some days we switch it up and do geography /science first. We are getting an in depth look at the world this year. Studying the Atlas as a whole and breaking it down to get a closer look at different regions of the world. Reading books from different places. Studying animals, climates, life in different places. Each child learns and is included according to ability and attention span. At some point I send the younger ones out to watch the toddler outside or to play with legos or play dough. I help older ones with thing they may need help on. We take a mid morning break for snack and lunch about noon. We try to listen to Spanish learning tapes while making lunch. After lunch and clean up I put on an exercise Dvd for the kids and put the toddler down for a nap. We read aloud, 4 and 5 year old lay down and read or sleep. Older kids read or work on 'homework' or piano lessons. After nap time snack and outdoor time is a great break mid afternoon. I jump in to keep laundry moving whenever I have a chance. This year we began a few extra curricular activities so our evenings have been filled with football, ballet and wood working. I teach the kids and my niece piano. That takes a full afternoon and practice time throughout the week. The kids love screen time which I am not so fond of. But I have found a rotation between wii, educational computer games, piano, watching the toddler... frees me up to get some one on one time with each of the children from time to time while they happily rotate through the stations. Throw in a bunch of baking, home projects, meal preparations, friends, family, church, church activities, work... And the calendar is quickly full. Baths, read aloud, prayers, bedtime. There's the run down. :) We are very excited about this upcoming year. Each of the kids are getting a chance to live out a dream. We have never been able to do this before. Two years ago we were at an all time low with no idea how we were even going to get our utilities on, much less afford our children's dreams! But God, in His mercy brought people into our lives who had the tools to give us hope again. Our life began to turn around with the council and care of some wonderful people at Advocare. Doors began opening and things began happening. Family stepped in and provided very practical aid. God has continued to move the chess pieces in our life and make a way where there seemed to be no way. Here we are two years later, continuing to grow and be changed: seeing dreams and desires realized in the process. Look at those beautiful children and the smiles on their faces as they step into their desires. They are made for such a time as this. Not just to get through another day, but to live and love and be a light. Certainly football, woodworking and ballet aren't the most important things in life, but learning to try, give it all, get out of our comfort zones, commit to a goal and enjoy a desire fulfilled are all worthy of some excitement. God is good. We are blessed. Never going back. How about you? Are you living?
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